Sorceror Series: A Long Walk/ Cross my Mind

Music. A song always reminds me of a moment or a person. The soundtrack of my life. Oddly this painting was inspired by Jill Scott's A long Walk. A beautiful song I fell in love with while in grad school. In the mornings I would open the gym(workstudy) and turn on the television in front of the cardio equipment. I would watch the morning videos from MTV, BET, and VH1 as I did my thirty minutes on the treadmill. This video and ultimately this song stayed in my mind. At first I thought it was a Erykah Badu Joint but nahh. Years later when I was contemplating the future and marriage I began this painting. My first attempt at a triptych. I would often watch her paint and it was one of the things that got me back to painting a lot. In the second panel I tried to meld our painting styles with a narrative of our courtship, and finally I entered the metaphor and the universal. The blue turtle watches the shining butterfly marveling at the strangeness of their union. Well Jill Scott narrates it better:

Jill Scott A Long Walk Lyrics
You're here, I'm pleased, I really dig your companyYour smile, your style, your peace mentality

Lord, have mercy on me, I was blind, now I can seeWhat a king supposed to be, Baby I'm feelin' free, come on and roll with me

Chorus: Let's take, a long walk, around the park, after dark, Find a spot for us to spark, conversation, verbal elation, stimulationShare our situations, temptations, education, relaxation, elevations, Or maybe we can talk about Surah 31:18

Your background, it ain't squeaky clean, shit sometimes we all gotta swim upstream

You ain't a saint, we all are sinners, but you put your good foot down and make your soul a winner

And I respect that, man you're so phat, and you're all that, plus supreme

Then you're humble, man I'm numb yo with feelin, I can feel everything that you bring.

Chorus: Let's take, a long walk, around the park, Find a spot for us to spark conversation, verbal elation, stimulationShare our situations, temptation, education, relaxation, elevation, or maybe we can talk about Revelations 3:17

Special: Or maybe we can see a movie, or maybe we can see a play on Saturday, or maybe we can roll a tree, or feel the breeze and listen to a symphony, or chill and just be, or maybe

Maybe we can take a cruise and listen to the Roots, or maybe eat some passion fruit, or maybe cry to the blues, or maybe we can just be silent. Come on, come on

ChorusSpecialChorus

Or maybe we can save the nation Come on

So after things fell apart and I threw away the things that I could stand to throw away that reminded me of her. This painting was too powerful to let go, but too painful to keep hanging. Until, while recovering I heard a another Jill Scott song that came like grace. It reinforced the biographical nature of the piece but also how recovery works:

Jill Scott Lyrics Cross my Mind(last verse)

You just running cross my mind*3

I was just thinking about you, wondering what you doing,

I mean what you've been up to. I know its wrong feeling this strong

let me take a second minute. I will think this thing through

I was just thinking about you, wondering what you doing I mean what you've been up to

I know its wrong feeling this strong let me take a second minute I will think this thing through Remember all the moments for two, how we used to

Oooh yeah

But the reality honestly you where never good for me and I was never good for you. I just remember what we used to do.

To quote Team America, "Maybe feelings are called feelings because we have no control over them." But you can put them into context. She called me last week out the blue and it was nice, but it didn't hurt and I wasn't angry, I just enjoyed the conversation and looked at the painting hanging in my hallway/ gallery and just remebered what we used to do.