Home of random thoughts, misguided musings, wicked words and the men who make them.

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

The Sorceror Series: Apotheosis

If you see Buddha on the road kill him.

We are what we do, not what we think or believe. I began to understand my primary sense of self through what others expected. Kevin was a construct driven by exterior expectations. So I killed him… in a symbolic sense. Death always allows change. This painting became the symbol of what I aspired to do. It maps out my intentions as opposed to expectations.
The Southwest skyline represents the desert and the mandatory time of solitary contemplation. The Great Blue River represents the life experience. The great black shape is the chest emblem (necessary accessory of any adolescent power fantasy archetype) of Blak Fox, my first enduring creation and the foundation of my multiple personas. It’s the symbol of resistance on its most basic human level: the protection of the self. The turtle is my totem, my friend, my companion, my guide, myself. In many myths the Turtle carries the Universe or World on its back. That’s duty and the acceptance of responsibility. Also the turtle relates to a life changing experience and dream I had after a strange night of revelry in Fell’s Point with SuperOceanLad which involved liquor, pool, and my first encounter with opium in the restroom at Rod’s Bar.
I won’t discuss the particulars so as to protect SOL’s secret identity, but on the ride back home while in an altered state, I remember talking about why I thought I was put on the Earth. All this, while having a vision of the Yggrdasil as I was pissing in front of a gnarled giant tree in front of an old church on Route 40 just as you enter the county. That night I had a dream of the turtle that put everything into perspective and was further reinforced by the meeting of a turtle on my path to the bus stop to go to work. We have been connected ever since.
On the Turtles back sits the ideal of the emerging Sorceror. Existing out of time he manifests multiple arms while seated in the lotus position of meditation. In one hand he holds a silver ball a representation of spiritual life energy (prevalent in The Invisibles by grant Morrison… but I babble about that series too much as it is.) He holds a staff in his hand to aide on his life journey. One hand is raised in the fist of power and defiance and the other hand emulates Buddha touching the earth indicating his preparedness for enlightenment (the things you learn teaching Art appreciation.) Two hands hold the great light, the connection to the One. The sky rises up the spectral face of death, or at least the fear of its impending presence. Fear is the little enemy (Dune by Frank Herbert.) A symbolic attempt at creating a template. A continuance of the Shamans journey.



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